About
OH HEYYY!
I love that you’re here! I love that WE’RE here together!
And we’re all here together to experience the Chronicles of Carly – a passionately indifferent and intentionally inconsistent exploration of anything and everything life has planned for me. And now for US! Because you’re here, too.
This page will eventually be a physical Chronicles of Carly. A place where you can follow along with the happenings of my life, however that may look (blog? vlog? virtual scrapbook? still undecided).
For now, I will share with you a little inside information about said Chronicles.
PASSIONATE INDIFFERENCE
Life feels like a curated experience.
Like everything that happens is specifically meant for me.
Like I am seeing it, hearing it, or being exposed to it for a reason.
For the insight. For the inspiration. For the lesson. For the story.
From a seemingly insignificant but completely stunning leaf on the ground to an absolutely soul crushing, life-changing heartbreak – I sincerely assume that everything I come in contact with will somehow contribute to my highest expansion and greatest good.
And when I not-so-naively embrace this blind-but-all-seeing faith, it’s easy to feel a passionate indifference about life. To feel both lit up by possibility and detached from the outcome. To live both all the way in and completely unattached.
INTENTIONAL INCONSISTENCY
Before I’d considered the idea that I was passionately indifferent, I spent a lot of time thinking that I was unsteady.
I had a hard time trusting my feelings. My excitement. My ability to stick to things.
See
Experiencing or learning something brand new lights me up to the absolute brim of my being with excitement and curiosity and fervor for life.
TO THE ABSOLUTE BRIM OF MY BEING.
Like… I cannot even BELIEVE that my consciousness is a part of this right now and it is BLOWING MY MIND that THIS exists and LIFE exists and I exist HERE. In MY life. Experiencing THIS thing that is NEW and AMAZING.
I am here for THIS. I am all in.
THIS THING IS NOW MY ENTIRE LIFE.
And then it isn't.
And then I go to bed one night feeling completely satiated by this thing that is now my entire life, and wake up realizing that complete satiation means just that.
Completely satisfied.
All the way satisfied.
That I am full to capacity with satisfaction from said thing.
Satisfaction complete. Learning complete. Experience finished.
WAIT. Are you SERIOUS? I just made this thing my ENTIRE LIFE.
I committed to this thing.
I identified completely with this thing.
I AM THIS THING.
And this confusing cycle of passion and indifference had a way of making this majestic overly-confident showboat feel like a broken adult who would never follow through on finishing anything.
Until (thanks to a stream of synchronicities that will one day be a story on this page) it clicked for me that MAYBE THIS IS THE FUCKING POINT.
Maybe finishing things isn’t the point.
Maybe I am only supposed to be learning exactly what I need to know from each passionate outburst and nothing more.
Maybe it’s a fucking gift to be discerning enough to know when I’m done with an experience, so that I don’t waste my entire life trying to perfect something I’m not even meant to be participating in anymore.
Life IS short. Cliches exist for a reason.
Our time here is a magical and confusing and incredible blip of nothing.
Maybe it serves me better to be intentionally inconsistent so that none of my time here is wasted on things not meant for me.
EXPERIENCING AND EXPLORING
And now you know why we’re here together!
How passionate indifference and intentional inconsistency have created the Chronicles of Carly!
And how I will use those things to continue the Chronicles of Carly as life continues to curate this experience for me (and now for us).
Maybe you will follow me on an incredible mural painting journey that leads us all over the world, changing lives with bright colors and shameless authenticity.
Or maybe while I’m painting a mural at an orphanage in India, I’ll have an idea for a children’s book that consumes every thought-space in my brain and I can’t stop until it’s written and I never paint again.
Or maybe that children’s book takes me to a book signing in Japan where I play a video game that gives me an idea for my OWN video game and I spend the next 3 years in production and we all learn what it takes to make a video game together.
MAYBE. 2 months from now. I’m walking Joanie (a dog that is also a human) at the park and there’s a random pop-up mutt-centric dog show happening. And a dog show scout sees her and says that she’s the MOST BEAUTIFUL dog she’s EVER seen and all of a sudden we’re doing the mutt-centric dog show circuit and art is completely out the window?!
WE DON’T KNOW. That’s the point!
I’m passionately indifferent.
I’m intentionally inconsistent.
Expect everything and anything to come my (our) way.
But it would also help to expect absolutely nothing at all.